Reality?

The most incredible part of studying abroad is that the prospect of returning home excites you just as much as leaving home did. 

This is not to say that you’ll want to leave, and even if you do it’s a near guarantee that within a week or so of being home you’ll wish you were still abroad.

It also bring just as many unknowns.

Wait, what do you mean I’m in Australia, across the enormity of the Pacific Ocean? That I’ve lived here for the past five months? Did I really have all of those utterly ridiculous experiences? And have I really met these people, seen these sights? 

It’s June, I thought it would have sunk in by now and made sense, seemed less surreal. But no, as much as I have adjusted and acclimated to living this life, as soon as I stop and give it more than a passing thought I have to stop dead and laugh. This is just ridiculous, there’s no way this has been my life. 

Did I really get on that plane at LAX? I can’t process how this is supposed to be real.

What in the hell am I supposed to tell everyone back home? How do you explain something like this to them, especially when you yourself can’t get a handle on it? It’s such a paradigm shift, so hard to quantify but carries such magnitude on the bearing of your life and self. How do you go back home and synthesize your old life with your new experiences? How do you merge who you were with who you are? It’s hard enough to tackle these in isolation.

The people in your life see you in a certain light, they know you as the person who left just a few months ago, it’s unlikely the status quo has changed for them. Some may have not given more than a passing though to you, and others may have missed you everyday. But the person they miss will come home so changed. It feels as if I’ve had years and years worth of experiences, and I’ll return and be all full of excitement and stories and want to share it all with everyone, but really, though they will care, I cannot convey it with the complexity and impact of it all. They will never know this as I know it, I can not wire them my memories, emotions, pains, and joys gained out here. Can you go through something of this nature and then re-assimilate? Do you return to your old role within friend groups and your family or are you set to carve out a new role? Does anyone even notice the change in you? Or does it turn out to be nothing more than some extended memory that will never leave you, but never touch others? And what of the friends and connections established while abroad? Will you miss the routines and the little things? Do they become memories as well, fading out of reality as the days pass?

Will it seem a superiority complex, a story for everything? “Oh ya, this one time in Australia…” becoming your most used phrase. And everyone quickly getting sick of it. Somehow making you feel wiser and more aware because you were blessed enough to go abroad, does it actually make you any wiser, more aware? Or do you just layer on another set of illusions and probably false perceptions? 

Can you go back to doing what you did before? Does it still bring anything to the table? or has it become empty?

It’s so damn daunting because for the first time in your young life, something genuinely feels as if it has magnitude on a large scale, large enough to shape your entire life. There have been times where my life was genuinely in danger. This entire experience could have gone south so quickly. It hasn’t though. And that seems almost more dangerous, giving a false sense of invincibility. It’s a nasty side effect, you get reckless, figure it all just works itself out. And somehow, someway it does. And it scares the shit out of you that you have managed to pull it all off. It has taught you so much about yourself and the world, at least you think it has. You can’t know if anything is actually concrete because there is so little concrete to compare it to. 

But you have. And now all that remains is a couple of weeks, exams, and a trip with a brother to southeast Asia. 

And then the most daunting destination, Home. What is it to you now? And what are you to it? 

Welcome Home, Son

Absolutely the perfect song for those studying or living abroad.

40

40 days till I’m home. My favorite number. It’s biblical, not too much or too little. My old football number. Troy Percival. Etc.

 

A huge part of study abroad is this idea of “change”, it’s part of my draw to it and same goes for most others. What rarely is mentioned is what kind of change this is. You’d think people would mention it in blogs and social media, but turns out it’s so hard to quantify or explain, so it just gets left out.

 

I’ll give it a shot.

 

It scares me. It scares me that I will never be the same person or have the same outlook as I did 4 months ago. I can’t go back, I can’t undo these experiences. Nothing really can be undone in life, but for some reason this carries a much greater magnitude.The difference is so much bigger than anticipated. Something highlighted for me during a recent conversation with my brother planning our upcoming trip to Singapore, Bangkok and other parts of Thailand. Travel doesn’t seem a big deal to me at all now. A six day hike in Tasmania? Spend four days on an island in Thailand living with a Muslim fishing village? Heck yes, how do I make this happen? Four months ago I would have passed and stuck closer to a comfort zone. It’s still a daunting undertaking for him, same as it was for myself a few months back. I just hope I can shift his outlook closer to where I am now as I feel that opening up my eyes to traveling the world in unique ways has been a major positive of this experience.

 

It’s also scary to see that some of the traits that got me here in the first place have regressed or gone entirely in some cases. These I can fix and recover, and have already begun to do so. Much wear & tear and breakdown is to be expected upon one’s first time abroad, living alone across the pacific for five months after all. What is truly daunting is to see how many flaws and issues I hold within me and. I had thought I was doing things pretty well. But going walkabout has exposed parts of me in bad shape.

 

But I am beyond grateful for being exposed like this. I needed it so badly. I needed something or someone to call me out, to challenge me to step up, to show me my fleas and destructive behaviors, my vices and weaknesses. I’ve gotten that here without a doubt. And it will make me a better human being for it all. 

 

It’s time to return to what got me here while at the same time rebuilding the parts of me that were simply covered up by some shoddy facades. The last week has been excellent, dinner at a delicious back alley Korean BBQ place and then at Taxi Dining Room, the nicest restaurant in Melbourne and all of Australia. That was a well spent $70, props to a friend for making that happen. A tour of Rod Laver Arena where the Australian Open is played because I would be a terrible Holycross if I missed one of the great tennis sites in the world, bike tours around the city, experiencing Degraves St and all of the other lane ways and coffee shops of this city once more. It’s a fantastic part of study abroad to meet like minded and different minded people. They push you  I gotta say,I really have come to love being in this city and feel that it has become a part of me, I’m more hipster now (see the scruffy beard, long hair, beanie and fondness for coffee. And now it’s time to push the bar up higher, pick myself up and get to work in plenty of areas of my life. Learning mandarin anyone?

 

The final forty begins.

Edit: Tickets to Tasmania for the Great Overland track hike with some good friends, and tickets to Singapore and Kuala Lumpur purchased. Oh, and did I mention I’m meeting my brother in Singapore? Damn this is unreal, too blessed 

Normal

There’s certainly a part of me that is ready to be home. I suppose that is partially due to the barrage of “school’s out #summer #beach” posts that are flooding my social media while I still have a week of class and then an absurdly long time before exams. Last day of class is May 31. First exam is June 17, then June 19 and finally June 25. Who designed this schedule? They need to be fired. Being home and done for summer would be welcome.

But don’t get me wrong, studying abroad is an exceptional experience. Realizing that it’s almost June already and that the semester is nearly done makes me question where all the time has gone, and how it has gone so quickly. And then looking back makes me realize just how much I have done and it begins to seem forever ago that I was taking off from LAX. I am genuinely a different person in many way, I can’t lay them out on paper per say, but they are there.

To put it simply, I have different levels of normal. Travelling to Southeast Asia for two weeks alone would have been something I saw beyond myself in January. And now, I’m in the midst of planning it and wonder why I ever thought I couldn’t do it. Nothing, or nobody, fits into simple categories anymore, the world I used to paint rather black and white seems varying shades of grey and yet so much clearer. 

I set out with an intention to live like a local not a tourist. And I feel I’ve managed to do this. I feel like a local student and resident of Melbourne as much as I could after only four months. I picked up a part time job working in a coffee shop north of the city and what could be more Melbourne than working in a coffee shop? I almost forgot that I’ve only been here four months and not most of my life the other day, seriously the strangest feeling to have to reality check yourself back to where you remember that you haven’t been here your whole life and are leaving soon. Realizing this brings relief, gratitude, and a bit of regret. It will be a relief to be home, to be back to somewhere with Mexican food, which I am desperately missing, In N Out, beaches, beautiful weather, family, friends, familiarity and all of those perks. Relief to be home where I can truly rest and do some serious maintenance on my body and mind after what has been and will be five months of … I don’t really have the right word for this. Gratitude that I have this opportunity at all, that I have been able to do it, that these experiences are mine and the change in me is real and for the better, gratitude for the the hard lessons I have learned as well, gratitude that after such an unreal five months, going home still excites me because it is that good, because my family is that loving and my life at home is simply blessed. Gratitude that I get to do this all again, in a different country, continent, and hemisphere in less than a year. The small bit of regret that I simply do not have the time, money, and resources to see, hear, smell, taste and experience everything available to me here. I could have spent the entire five months in Melbourne CBD alone, not even the surrounding areas and not seen it all. Throw in the constant festivals and events, the surrounding areas, neighborhoods and districts, the rest of Australia, New Zealand, and Southeast Asia and well, many years and many dollars would be needed.

A few things I’ve picked up along the way:

1) Coffee is your best friend. Standard for most college kids, but doubly so while abroad and triply so in a city renowned for it’s coffee culture.

2) Fluctuations, be ready for them, some days you’ll want to do anything and everything and some days you simply want nothing more than to sleep and do nothing.

3) Take easy classes. I made the mistake of taking hard courses and can say that I will be taking easier ones next time around. Easier classes mean less stress, more time to explore and experience. Also, try and get courses that have essay finals or something due at the end of classes, not some that have final exams a full two weeks after class ends. Also, the academic structure will be different so expect to hit a learning curve at first.

4) Make a big list of things to do, and start crossing them off. 

5) $10 rule. While traveling, if something will significantly improve your welfare and experience and is about $10, do it, get it whatever. Not paying a premium at the airport for a sandwich because you’re trying to save money will make your flight and subsequently destination miserable because your hungry and tired. Get the sandwich. (got this one here http://chrisguillebeau.com/3×5/lessons-learned-from-11-years-of-travel/)

 

I’ve done some seriously cool thing the last month, including seeing Afrika Bambaataa live over in Fitzroy, going to see 2001: A Space Odyssey in the 1930s vintage Astor Theatre in St. Kilda, heading down to Brighton Beach, brewing out own cider that turned out damn good among other things. Now it’s on to the final stretch, planning out the last trips I’ll get to take, preparing for exams and doing my best to make the most of this before returning the land of sunshine, beautiful girls, In N Out and Mexican food. 

 

Oh…and it looks like the world’s greatest brother is heading out to meet me in Singapore and Thailand in a month. Damn this is gonna be awesome.

Halfway

71 days in, 71 days out.

The halfway point is already here. 

Pretty crazy really, it feels longer than 71 days but also as if it’s all happened so quickly. In very, very few ways has this been anything like I expected it to be. For both good and bad. I’ve certainly got some epic stories to tell and I’ve had moments of unabated joy, and some where nothing sounded more appealing than jumping on a plane and heading home. I’ve been skydiving, scuba dived on the Great Barrier Reef, partied with some Swedish girls and a Scot whose been traveling his whole life, met two fellas named J Wiggy and Carl from an island of 300 people. I’ve slept in stranger’s houses, woken up across the entire city, been caught out in near hurricane force winds on the edge of a cliff, whitewater kayaking, rock climbing sheer faces, and sat on ledges high above the ground. I’ve learned to live on my own, how to shop at the Queen Victoria Market successfully, I’ve been to Sydney, taken spontaneous train rides to Newcastle, slept in parks, cars, on top of mountains, learned to drive on the other side of the road, driven the entire South Island of New Zealand, seen some of the most amazing and awe inspiring views on the planet. I’ve been to music festivals, rock concerts and more. Melbourne is natural to me now. I’ve done so much and I know there’s some already forgotten. I’ve yet so much to do and know that I won’t be able to do it all.

Life looks to be changing gears now, on more than one front. Not that I can give many specifics. It’s been a hell of a ride so far, cheers to the second half trumping the first.

 

Still Walking,

Rug

Boundaries & Bubbles

The point where what should be extraordinary begins to seem normal is a strange situation to find yourself in.

I found myself walking through the Chinatown district of a city halfway across the world. I found myself walking with ease, a certain comfort and poise that would have been unthinkable six weeks ago. Six weeks ago I can distinctly recall attempting to walk down Little Bourke St attempting to find some cheap, scrumptious Asian fare and being quite overwhelmed. Bright neon signs, flashing my retinas with multiple Asian languages, my nose barraged by scents & spices and my ears assailed by a cacophony of languages. Try Shanghai St Dumpling, Ghin Khao, Noodle Kingdom, walk down a side alley for some place called New Kum Den, try our curry, we have the best sushi, freshest fish, spiciest dishes, on and on with the constant siege of the senses. Sensory overload.

The other night, same place, same time on a busy Saturday night in this lively city of Melbourne. Walking down Chinatown in search of some tom yum, pad thai, fried rice or whatever else caught my fancy; except this time I was able to savour all of it, less barrage and more indulgence of the senses. Despite this something nagged at me just a little. A little bug, an itch and a tingle tipping me off. I needed to explore more, push boundaries again. It was still an awesome experience, but this time I felt entirely comfortable. And for some reason this struck me in a not entirely positive light. I don’t think about which way to look crossing the streets (I know, it sounds silly but you’d be amazed how hard of a habit it is to break when you grew up with look left then right and it’s switched on you), I don’t ever need to pull out my phone for directions, it’s all become pretty natural now.

“Natural and comfortable” in a foreign city brings with it positives and negatives. It’s kick ass to be able to know exactly where you are, being comfortable and confident allows you to enjoy the city in many ways. You know some little tricks and shortcuts, you know that you have certain favorite places and sections of the city. It also makes you complacent. Comfortable means that the brand new sheen and excitement aren’t there anymore. Comfortable makes it easy to fall into a bubble, to begin to hit a simple routine and roll through days without the sense of adventure that was a constant during the first months of this adventure. It makes you return to the same few haunts over and over. You stop expanding and growing. Bubble. Not to say establishing certain favourites is bad, just that when surrounded by such a vibrant city it would be a shame to box oneself in. I’ve spent the better part of two weeks mostly within the four block radius of my apartment and the university. Sure, it’s nice to keep a low profile for a while, but I’m not here to be comfortable. Living abroad is not about falling into a routine. It’s about constantly being on your toes and ceaselessly pushing boundaries in some way. So though there is much to be said for some routine and some rest and recharging, it is vitally important to remember why you are abroad in the first place and to take advantage of it to the fullest.

A few more tips for any of those reading this and planning on going abroad in the future:

• Make a budget, even if you blow it out of the water, and you probably will, it’s a much better peace of mind knowing where your money is going and how you can save as opposed to checking your bank account and seeing decidedly smaller figures than you did a week ago
• Remember who you are, why you came and stick to these things. Growth is good, change can also be negative and it’s important to recognize the difference
• There’s a huge difference between dead horse (what they call tomato sauce) and Heinz ketchup. And yes, it is a big deal. I want ketchup, not tomato sauce with my eggs

I would hope that this little adventure bug sticks with me even after I return home. Looking back now, it is easy to see how much I allowed myself to stay inside the box. I fully intend to change this mindset upon returning and believe that this is an excellent lesson to apply anywhere. It doesn’t matter where we are in the world, our hometowns may seem dull and we may feel we have seen it all, but there are always boundaries to expand, new things to try, and bubbles to be burst.

 

Still Walking,

Rug

Two Guys, One Spoon

 I’ll start off by listing the places we slept: Couch, hostel, park, airport, on top of a mountain, a house called “the ghetto” and in El Cheapo.

So here’s the story of what happens when two guys go to Sydney, Newcastle and New Zealand with one spoon and attempt to drive the entire south island in 8 days.

Wednesday morning saw me up and at the bus station at 4am to catch a bus to the airport for my 6am flight to Sydney. We got go Sydney with zero plans and decided that heading to Bondi beach was a good idea. So we caught a bus that direction, hopped off and walked 5 km with all our backpacks of stuff uphill to the beach. Just the beginning 0f much walking and vagabonding about. Bondi is famous for a reason, great sand, sunshine, perfectly clear water, and a classic surf town vibe. All was well till I walked over barefoot on the rocks and gashed my toe real nice and had to buy band aids to fix that up. A nice little travel scar to start the trip off with. No big deal really, headed down into the city after that to check out what Sydney was about and spent most of the day just wandering around the city and checking stuff out. Frankly, wasn’t all that enthralled, it felt just like another city, nothing distinct about it’s character or personality. The Opera House and Harbour Bridge were the standouts as they are pretty spectacular. Met up with a couple of people we know from Cairns and Chapman who were kind of enough to let us crash on their couches for the night. Went to a real good Malaysian food place that was quite good after traveling on about 3 hours sleep and walking around all day with a stuffed backpack. Best discovery of Sydney was made here, the restaurant served a drink called Teh Tarik which is a traditional Malaysian tea. It’s the nectar of the gods in my opinion. 

The next day saw us grab breakfast at a place which served quinoa toast topped with eggs avocado and bruschetta. Pretty delicious. Went over and checked into the only night of hostel stay we had the whole trip, walked over to Darling harbour which was a real cool area and then took a monorail around part of the city. Yes, they have a monorail. Went back to the hostel, went to the room next door because frankly our room kinda was a downer, before heading out for the night. Ended up at a bar across town and managed to get separated crossing a rainbow road. Literally. Sydney has a massive gay population and we managed to get lost and separated in the gay district which was interesting getting back from to say the least.

Went back to the Opera house and Bridge the next day after walking through and napping in the botanical gardens which were impressive. Then walked over the bridge go north Sydney which we both found more to our liking and more laid back to have some bomb fish and chips. Walked down the street and saw a train station and decided to catch a train for $4 up to Newcastle which is a beach town kinda city. Got there pretty late and decided a park was a good place to sleep, woke up and realized we were much more in the open than we realized. Oh well, walked out to the lighthouse and point and then hit the beach for a few hours after checking out the town. Caught a train back to the airport to catch our flight into Christchurch.

Landed in Christchurch at 130 am, grabbed a food and slept for a couple hours till they woke everyone up at 5am. Great way to start off Easter Sunday. Decided to walk the 15km into town at 530 am and did. Christchurch is still in ruins from the earthquakes in 2011 and we didn’t realize this till we went to walk into downtown and we’re confronted with fences and caution tape and wrecked buildings everywhere. Let’s put it this way, there wasn’t a Catholic Church open for Easter mass. Disappointing and creepy.  There was a piece of street art with the outline of the Christchurch cathedral and the words “we will smile again”. We honestly couldn’t even find somewhere to get breakfast. The only shopping center in town was built of storage containers and closed.

So we got back to the airport rented a car and got outta town.

Driving on the left side was quite fun and not really hard at all. We drove down through a couple of cool towns along the east coast and hit a few scenic spots to see seals and penguins. No penguin sightings though. Got into Dunedin about dinner time and grabbed some food, checked out the town and headed west towards Te Anau. Slept in the car and drove into Te Anau the next morning, stocked up on food and booked my kayak trip before heading to the Fiordlands and Milford sound.

The sheer scale of things there was amazing. It was just gorgeous and so impressive to see it all. Almost to much to take in and comprehend. Picked up a couple of German dudes hitchhiking and gave them a lift into the park. Driving into the fiordlands entails some of the most epic scenery on the planet as well as th 1km long homer tunnel. After the tunnel the drive leads into Milford. We realized we had missed our intended hike and backtracked a bit to get to Gertrude’s saddle. We hiked up it starting about 4 pm. It’s one of the most incredible hikes I’ve ever done and only Yosemite compares. Waterfalls, glacial valleys, a lake high atop the saddle and absolutely breathtaking views. We pitched our tent on top of the saddle overlooking the glacial valleys and Milford Sound. We woke up about 4 am to snow coming down on us and had to climb down in the dark with only one light. It was pretty sketchy but an unreal experience. Got back to the car and drove back to Milford to kayak on the sound which was just mind blowing. Being in a kayak surrounded by 4500 foot cliffs and mountains and waterfalls on a real deep fjord is something that you honestly can’t wrap your head around.

After that we started driving to Queenstown and picked up another hitchhiker who turned out to be originally from Modesto, CA and lives in Queenstown. He offered us a place to crash on his couches for picking him up so we took him up on that after checking out Queenstown and going to Ferg Burger which has some seriously huge amazing burgers. Planned on going out but ended up just hanging out in “the ghetto” as its called with the guy we picked up and a few of his roommates, roommates being from Italy, UK and other places. It was all in all an unexpected but very cool night and experience. Went and hiked Ben Loman Saddle the next day  for some more awesome views of the mountains and lake surrounding Queenstown. The range near Queenstown is called “The Remarkables” and lives up to it’s billing. Combine that with views of the Southern Alps and you quickly see why Lord of The Rings was filmed in New Zealand.

Left Queenstown that night and headed up the west coast, slept in the car after driving some very windy and dark mountain roads and seeing some of the clearest stars I’ve seen in my life. I absolutely love starscapes and plan to be among them one day. The next morning saw us at the Fox and Franz Josef Glaciers which were quite something else. Straight out of the land before time, big glaciers coming down rainforest valleys, and not 5 min drive off the coast highway. We took the opportunity to fill up our water with pure glacial water which was very pure and crisp.

After that we continued up the west coast into Greymouth and then cut inland towards Nelson and Abel Tasman National Park. Slept in the car again, woke up drove to Abel Tasman and walked 25km of the Great Coastal Track there. It’s literally a tropical paradise. Not something you’d ever expect in New Zealand, but beautiful and enchanting all the same.

The following day saw us over in Marlborough Sounds hiking the Queen Charlotte track after having a mild confrontation on a mountain road with a cow just strolling down it. Had some spectacular views there as well. The next day we went down to Kaikoura slept in the car on the beach and woke up to sunrise over the ocean with snowcapped mountains surrounding the bay. Just plain beautiful. We then went and saw the fur seal colony on the coast and then walked up a small track to see seal pups playing and frolicking in a stream and at the base of a waterfall in a pool. Yes, seal pups, in a pool at the base of a waterfall. Followed this up with another hike to get a good view of the ocean and daunting snow capped mountains behind us.

That about wrapped up our trip other than a gorgeous sunrise over a river the next morning and 8 hours in the Christchurch airport.

All in all, a crazy, exhilarating and epic trip with lots of stories to tell, experiences and pictures to share.

 

Learning Curves

Each and every day is another change in the tides. Some days the energy bursts forth from me, some days I run as a beat up old pick up, all stutter stop and stall outs. It’s all so incredibly volatile, it becomes hard to do much beyond keep moving, keep adapting, learning, and growing.

Such is life I suppose. It’s a reality that all begin to face one day and many quickly come to loathe and dread. As for me, I’ve just begun. Just begun to find my feet in the world, just begun learning how to keep those not so little necessities of life from dropping rainclouds on my big ideas and grandiose plans, hell it’s hard enough from keeping them from raining on my everyday joys. It’s not easy learning to manage your own life for the first time. Any who say otherwise are simply puffing their chests. Add in the small factor of doing it in a foreign country and you end up with a real steep learning curve.

I guess as I’m going about writing this I’m still struggling with so many moving pieces in my head that it becomes so hard not to let them all fall to the ground. Times like these can oft lead me dangerously close to places I’ve been before and never want to be again. It’s hard to fight yourself because you’re not even aware that you’re doing it. You can’t say oh well my enemy will likely make this move or that play; you know exactly what you’ll do, except you really don’t.

I dunno, at this point I’m just chucking words and thoughts out on paper to give myself some sort of release or seeking some inspiration. I’ve hit the point where I’m beginning to feel the wear and fatigue of the last two months. The little boy inside me would love nothing more than to run home to mom and hide in her arms. Hell, part of the 20 year old me feels the same way. I guess when you’re blessed with such a loving family that it makes it pretty hard to be away. It also makes it so much easier. Knowing that you have such amazing support at all times and in all conditions makes it easier to pick yourself up a little bit. 

______

So the previous paragraphs were written a few days ago. I’d just gotten back from a whirlwind 12 day semester break that saw me travel to Sydney, Newcastle, and the entire South Island of New Zealand. I reckon it’s worth recounting some of that trip as it was one hell of a trip. I’ll put that in a separate post. The result of that trip and the preceding two months was a burned out and worn down self, something reflected in my previous writing. Since then I’ve picked myself back up and have gotten rest and nutrition to revitalize.

“Do what you gotta do, just don’t stay still, otherwise life moves on without you.”

A little bit of sage advice from an older brother who knows a hell of a lot more than anyone gives him credit for, including himself, and probably me. It’s a small bit of advice that seems to make so much sense out here in this extraordinary world that I’ve found myself in. It’s so simplistic and blunt, yet so effective; certain things have to be taken care of in order to keep the wheels spinning and the engine humming.

It’s a steep learning curve as I said before, and I do believe I’m beginning to reach the top of it so I reckon I’ll leave some things I’ve learned for anyone else who goes abroad,

Lesson #1: Everything is more expensive than you think.

Lesson #2: Nothing will go smoothly, and that is what will make it all memorable

Lesson #3: Every tough experience is making you that much better. Appreciate it.

Lesson #4: You can and will adapt and thrive in any given situation. Just relax, breathe, and keep pushing forward.

Lesson #5: Do what keeps you healthy and happy, don’t get caught up in negative spirals.

Hopefully someone reading this is able to get some guidance and help from these.

Since dealing with a major identity change and depression brought about by post concussion symptoms I’ve taken a vested interest in my brain and how to enhance the brain in general. The latest result of this, following nutrition and proper supplements for my brain, is a foray into lucid dreaming. For those who don’t know what this is, it’s when you become aware that you are dreaming within a dream and proceed to control the dream. This allows you to do essentially anything you want. More importantly, It has been used in the past by Greeks and Romans to allow them to build “memory libraries”. Huge libraries of memories and information within your mind that allow for greatly increased memory and retention. Another result of lucid dreaming is a much sharper sense of the world around you. All of it intrigues and excites me. We’ll see how it goes for me. 

Another note, I may not end up doing all of next year at City University in London and delaying my departure for there until Spring. This being due to a couple of factors. Financially, I doubt I’ll have a whole lot of funds left when I return home and 2 months isn’t enough time to earn sufficient funds really. Academically, I’ve found that though I am adapting to the different style of learning out here, I do greatly prefer the education at Chapman and want to take full advantage of that. Also, another semester at Chapman would allow me to take 18 units and get even more ahead in my program, therefore allowing me to take tea and crumpet tasting in London and having more free time to travel and less stress. It will also be good for me to have more time at home to properly rest and prepare to go abroad again as it is a pretty big endeavor  I’d also like to potentially do an international internship in Summer 2014, possibly in Hong Kong, but that’s a whole other process and decision to consider.

Regardless, there’s nothing I can say except that I am unbelievably blessed to even be here and have begun to rediscover the excitement that I had prior to hitting a wall last week. Excited for what the future holds.

 

Still walking.

 

Questions, Conversations, and Cliffs

At about my age it’s pretty common to get the question “What do you want to do with your life?” Most of us don’t really have an answer, most people don’t know for the majority of their life. When people pose this question to me I’m not really sure how to answer. It’s not that I don’t have a direction, I think I’ve got that decently figured, it’s an issue of explanation. See, when people talk about traveling they tend to talk about seeing the world, that’s awesome and all, but I want to meet the world. I want to know as much of it as I possibly can, because you can’t change the world without knowing it first. And I may come to find that the world has no need of my somewhat grandiose plans and expectations of myself, and I’d be perfectly happy to find that to be true, but it sure seems unlikely. So for now, I’ll continue on meeting the world and getting to know it as best I can, I know that I’ll never be able to understand or meet all of it, but that’s not what’s important really. What’s important is that I better myself as a person, and better the world as a place to live, to learn, and to thrive in for those that come after me. I’ve been given so much in life already that it’s important for me to return the favor.

I’ve been down under a month now, and I can actually say my feet have hit the ground now. And that’s certainly a good thing as freefall gets pretty exhausting. Besides, you can’t get to know the nooks and crannies of the world from way up high, you need your feet for that. I’ve had some moments of genuine inspiration in the last week or so regarding different aspects of life. It’s incredible how much more you begin to appreciate what you have back home while your abroad. I’ve always loved my family and they’ve always been one of the most important things in my life but being out here makes me realize just how blessed I am to have such a family. There’s an idea brewing in my head regarding what I may want to do to make an impact that I think is incredible, though I am biased, but we’ll see where that goes later. It didn’t really hit me until about a week ago that my first experience living alone and taking care of all aspects of my life was actually happening across the world in a foreign country. Pretty damn cool if you ask me, and something that I really feel is invaluable life experience. It hasn’t been all sunshine though, both literally and figuratively. It’s nice to have it cool down so I can sleep without sweating. Coming to realize that some of my old habits still resurface, being somewhat too quick to judge, regarding my classes and other things out here, and I’m glad that this is bringing all those fixable things to light. That’s a big reason I’m out here after all.

Though I say I’m settling in, I can’t say I’m not still throwing myself off cliffs, figuratively of course. I’ve tried eel, octopus, and prawns among other things. Went to a footy match, to Moomba Festival, saw a bagpipe band in Flagstaff Gardens, and went to bars down back alleys themed as insane asylums with drinks served in syringes. I had a talk with a self professed philosopher from Sri Lanka in the park the other day, certainly interesting. When I titled this blog Gone Walkabout I didn’t realize how relevant the title would be. I average about 5 miles a day walking out here, either around the city or out on Philip Island during a storm this last weekend when we went camping and saw the penguin parade and the Nobbies (look it up). I’ve done more dancing at places like Club Retro (80′s & 90′s music) and Future Music Festival than ever before, and I’m probably still terrible at it.

As the first month ends, the next looks to take on a different structure, more school oriented during the week and travel oriented on the weekend. Semester break is already next week and there’s only 9 weeks of class left before finals in June. Hoping mine are early in the month so I can take off and travel up to Bali, Malaysia, Bangkok, Singapore and whatever I have time and money for. Heading out on a camping trip and going kayaking, bushwalking and rock climbing this weekend. Myself and a buddy are heading to Sydney for 4 days and then road tripping the South Island of New Zealand over break so definitely looking forward to that.

As always, more grateful than I can say to my family and friends and those who’ve given me so much. Love you guys.

Still Walking,

Rug

Fireworks over the city at Moomba Festival

Octopus at Queen Victoria Night Market

Footy match – NAB Cup Final between Brisbane Lions and Carlton Blues

Nobbies

Nobbies again

The ends of the Earth

Breathe

I swear sometimes I fabricate reasons to get wound up and stressed.

I’m sitting in a beautiful park in the middle of a vibrant city as the sun sets. And my dumb ass was creating reasons to freak out and decide that this whole thing sucked not even an hour ago. Joke’s on me, by me. It likely comes down to being a bit tired and worn after over two weeks of going non stop…it’s only been 16 days…it feels like a year. That along with classes starting up this past Monday; which is both good and bad. I love to learn and to think, but all I want to do now is travel, explore and thrive. My subjects seem interesting and engaging, though I don’t initially like the large lecture hall classes and the feeling that I could simply not show up and no one would know the difference. It’s just too tempting here, and I know the classes won’t be easy, or maybe I’m just stressing too much about them.

It’s strange, I’ve always been a homebody, and certainly still am, but since being here if I’m not constantly doing something new, walking about, exploring, going to see Blink 182 (okay we sat on a hill behind the venue, but we heard it perfect and it was pretty damn cool) with the city in the background, going out to Brunswick for a warehouse sale, to Fitzroy for a rooftop bar with amazing views of the skyline, walking down to Southbank past Fed Square and Flinders St. Station and into Queen Victoria Gardens and along the Yarra I get ancy. I feel like I’m missing opportunities.

Went for a wander through the city to calm myself and ended up at a Catholic Church of all places. It’s a beautiful one and I plan on making it to mass there as it’s not all that far from where I live. Just wandering in brought me a great sense of calm and familiarity.

There’s just so many places to explore in this city it’s gonna take all the time I’ve got. Despite the CBD (downtown) area being so engaging, the suburbs are certainly full of more personality and hold a fonder place in heart. Fitzroy looks straight out of the turn of the century ans has about as high of a hipster level as you will find anywhere (in a good way) it also has some great eats and delicious noodle places. Brunswick is similar architecturally but much tamer and classically suburban. Down in St. Kilda and Elwood has been my favorite so far. It’s a beautiful beach town complete with an old amusement park. It’s also got some beautifully clear water and sand. The best part of everything is that it’s not more than 30 min by tram from one to the other. I’ve been to the Melbourne Museum as well which certainly is going to require multiple more visits. The street music and art is unbelievably good here, actually bought a CD from one of the bands during White Night called Pludo who are very good.

During orientation we were fortunate enough to have Pete Wheeler, founder of The Lonely Planet travel writing company come and speak to us about his travels. And he’s got some hell of a travel log. I wouldn’t mind doing travel writing for a few years or so if I could. Gotta be thankful for the people I’m out here with, having good friends always makes life easier and this is true a hundredfold when you’re across the world.

Who knows what the next few weeks hold, Future Music Festival on Sunday, applied for a spot at TEDx Sydney in the Sydney Opera House to see Bill Gates speak. New Zealand trip is being planned for semester break, possibly a roadtrip down the Great Ocean Road with some swedes we met up in Cairns the other week. Definitely looking to get into the sports scene here as well as Footy is starting up now.

Read a fellow student abroad’s blog about life in London and now I’m already stoked for that next year. Getting ahead of myself, I know. But like my fellow blogger, I also had a moment today where I was literally walking though the city and started laughing I was so euphoric. It’s just that incredible to have this experience. If you have the opportunity to study abroad please do, or at least travel and experience this.

Unbelievably grateful as always to everyone who’s helped me make this happen, especially my family. Love you guys. Still not sharkbait.

The walkabout rolls on.

Tapestry at the Melbourne Museuem

Blink-182 at the Sidney Myer Music Bowl

Warehouse Sale in Brunswick

View from rooftop bar in Fitzroy

Campus

South Lawn on campus

Old Quad

More Campus

The Spot building where I have most of my courses

Saint Mary Star of the Sea Catholic Church